tiny beast

The scientific name for a raccoon is procyon lotor. This translates roughly to "pudgy bear who rips open my garbage bags and spreads last night's Moe's chips all over the bed of my truck like a corn-based blizzard." Raccoons have weirdly human hand prints. My truck looks like a muddy baby crawled all over it. Are truck-climbin' babies common around here? I'm not well-versed in the native wildlife. Garbage bags have a tendency to be messy when ripped open by wild animals. I think it's mostly due to the fact that they are usually filled with garbage. What are raccoons afraid of? Maybe I could build a small statue of a fearsome creature. I don't really know how to build anything though. Every time I've tried, I've cut myself severely. Perhaps I could be the fearsome creature? That raccoon might take one look at a bloodied rascal trying to saw a 2 x 4 into some sort of winged avenger and roll up out.